I can't believe it's been almost 4 months since I wrote a blog! Time passes very quickly and I suppose I've been up to much.

A few months ago I injured my wrists, placing a brick wall right in the middle of the road to becomming a massage therapist. It also meant I had to quit my job as barista. Funnily enough, even after putting in my two weeks notice in October , I find myself still working at the coffee shop. I suppose when you love something enough, it is a bit hard to give up. I'm beginning to find I won't have a choice soon.

I will admit, this has been a difficult time. I laugh about it, though. Truly, truly it brings me some weird sense of joy. I wish I could convey this in a clear way. Though the injuries will make it very difficult for me to find work in the future and will probably get worse

Mmmmm.

There is just something about rain.

Yesterday I journeyed to Seattle with a few friends. And, after driving around for what seemed like hours, finally found a parking spot several blocks from a very important record store (one of our many destinations that afternoon).When we first set out early in the morning, the weather looked promising. So I did not bring an umbrella. But true to Seattle, it began chucking it down by lunch time. We decided to walk the odd number of blocks to the record store anyway.

At first, I felt a little unsure of this whole "getting wet" thing. The rain came down harder and harder as our heels pressed into every new step, soaking us to the absolute brim. But eventually I learned that puddles feel ever so lovely to step into, and even began to outstretch my hands as a gesture of acceptance towards the rain. It reminded me of that old musical "Singing In the Rain". I swear, I even heard the rain come down like tiny music notes, each resounding uniquely together upon my face. And for a moment, the world froze - like they do in the films when lovers embrace upon first reuniting or when a suffering soul reaches the cleansing joy of redemption.

I collect moments like that; moments when no matter where I am or who I am with or what I am going through, I am filled with some strange kind of delight that everything in all of its complexity really is simple. Those are the moments when the world slows on its axis, and I get this picture in my mind of God just...smiling. You know, the way a Dad smiles when he's delighted to give his child something they really really really want. It's that reaction: that quiet "you know I'm happy to" reaction. Oh! That's such a good reaction. Blimey, I feel like such a child when that happens!

Ha! And that's what I want to accomplish. I spend so much time trying to be grown up and forget what it means to delight in being a child. At times I wonder if that's all it takes - to have the kind of faith that shakes mountains. A simple faith full of wonder and awe towards God. It puts us in such a position of true humility; joyful humility. I mean, how many of us, if we're honest, get stuck in a rut thinking we know all there is to know about theology or church or the Bible? That arrogance is a sin and a distraction from the beautifully simple relationship we have with God.

If we feel we are at a place where we no longer need to grow (or even that there is not much more to God and faith than we already know), may we pray for God to slap us in the face with a wake up call - immediately! And that is what I have to say today.

With love,
Courtney Danielson

Oh Holy Spirit.

I want to start a book. I have waited a long time to do such a thing. And by that, I really mean I have not waited long at all. 22 years of life claim me. I'm young. I suppose my life will be the novel; my reflections and prayers the flesh. I do not know where this book will go and I have no expectation of it ever being published. I may only be writing it for myself, or for the few who most appreciate my picture-like writing style. We shall see.

Separately, a close friend rang me last night in the middle of his vacation. He just had to tell me about his experiences in Redding, California. If you know nothing of the place, please google it and click on anything having to do with revival. Man, the things my friend told me made be cry. I could hardly say much after a time, which is unusual for me. I just felt so...impacted or...I'm not sure. I suppose I felt helpless. Let me say why.

My friend talked about what God is doing in Redding - how the Holy Spirit is moving. It all sounded amazing, and though it was not new news (I have heard such reports on numerous occasions of Christians performing miracles as a daily task), I still felt surprised. I would even venture to say I felt shocked. I have experienced many wonderful things from the Holy Spirit, but I have really only had a small taste. He is doing so much more elsewhere. I won't go into details because there is just SO much. But my conversation with this young man...ugh! I WANT MORE! I know I am limited right now. I have felt it for some time and it has frustrated me beyond the point where I can take it. I MUST experience more freedom in the Holy Spirit soon. As a wise and dear friend often says, 'to live in the flow of the Holy Spirit'. Even the thought of such a thing fills me with unexplainable delight.

Politics and C.S. Lewis among other things.

I've been thinking about politics lately. I don't like politics much. I'm beginning to realise this as of late, what with the presidential elections sitting on our laps and all. I doubt many people will appreciate that I don't like politics - or that I have little faith in human governing. It's flawed of course since we are flawed. I'm not an anarchist by any means. I have less interest in that than I do American politics.

Mostly, I prefer not to think about politics if I can help it and just focus on Jesus things - like relationship and the church. We have no control over the future, though we may think we do by pushing our political causes (or candidates) til it is no longer about what the cause will help and instead about being right. I have also observed that very political Christians spend more time arguing about issues with each other than they do praying together about them (or praying for one another). My thoughts? It is only God who knows what must be done about anything. We bicker and argue and fight to keep our prides; in the process damaging or hindering relationships and missing the bigger picture of God (2 Timothy 2:22-24).

I don't know the answer for how a kingdom child must go about politics. What we consider many of the purposes of Christ might fit perfectly well into political causes and stances. I have no opinion there (or a developed one at least). Other than such an observation, unfortunately, politics is an important part of our world. Whether it is a necessary one is another matter. With that in mind, I am not excempt from having political views, which may sound very hypocritical of me. I don't really care. I am being honest and admittedly processing through things. Now these thoughts come spewing out into one terrible and incomplete mess. It is likely that a year from now I will be just as uncertain.

Seperately, I'm reading more. The past few weeks I've managed to get a few good books in. I like this. I've been making time in the evenings and some mornings to read Christian fiction. I just finished The Great Divorce by our beloved Clive Staples Lewis - what a name - and I do recommend this reading. It offers an interesting and challanging view of Heaven and Hell through a dream. Now I have just begun yet another C.S. Lewis read: That Hideous Strength. It's of a trilogy and so far I am finding it quite difficult. Lewis writes this in a way I'm not accustomed to, not to mention it is not a simple work to follow. But I'm enjoying the challenge.

It seems I am going in waves of being disciplined about one thing and not another. And so it is with reading - disciplined about reading, but not about other things. Deary me. This is hard, but I'm not worried about it. It's all about God anyway. And He can take care perfectly well. ;)

Oh yes, God is good.

Yes, yes. I know. I have not written an update in a very long time. I have been, for the past few weeks, commuting between Gig Harbor and Seattle for school. The reason being dog sitting...for my parents...while they were away in HAWAII. No, I am not jealous at all. I had a really good few weeks.

But it did mean that my time was very limited. And so for the past few weeks I have not exercised, have not been very good about reading the Word that gives life, and have not - admittedly - even been eating the healthiest of things. But tomorrow is a new day, and I look forward to doing better.

Despite this all, I do have a few good things to report. First is that in school I have had so many wonderful opportunities to share my faith. (And school is going super well, by the way. I got 100% on my written final for this past module, and my class grade is 98.5% overall; which is not normal for me, so praise God).

Sharing my faith is by no means glamorous. Often I feel as though I am not getting anywhere. But there God provides that glimmer of hope that He is doing something. Most recently, a discussion about Jesus has been very much opened between a girl and I from class. I've been praying for a core group of girls from there, and she is one of them. I'm super excited to see how God uses me - (Please do, God).

Also, this week God has blessed me with work every single day. I have done $15/hour babysitting two days this week, and the rest of the week I have been working at a glass blowing studio/art gallery in Ballard. I am running the art gallery and it has been wonderful. Mind you, this is only temp work until Saturday.

Anyway, Wednesday I met one of the glass blowers and something in me felt like he might be a Christian. I was very convinced this was so, but did not think to ask. And of course I forgot about it after leaving work. This afternoon I came in and heard him playing Christian music on the radio while I was showing some of the customers around. After the customers left, I went back to the studio room and asked him. We were so delighted to find out we are both Christians. The spirit within me must have recognized the Holy Spirit within him on Wednesday when we met. I felt very encouraged.

We greeted one another with what I like to call 'the right hand of fellowship' (a firm but intimate handshake between believers) and a proper hug. It was great to talk about our struggles as Christians within a non-Christian working environment. He really did encourage me in what is happening at school - and that God is always the one to do the moving. We are only tools; vessels, rather. He works through us and His will be done, not our own.

These days I am always so delighted when unexpectedly discovering another believer in my midst. That must be something God has done in me, to recognize the power of His grace. How wonderful is when we encounter someone who too is saved; spared? Shouldn't we be rejoicing every time we come together with believers, proclaiming what Christ has done for us!? It's good stuff, man. Good stuff.

End of blah blahing. Have a good day, friends.

Yours faithfully,

Courtney (Dani to those who prefer it)

Your Opinion Matters!

It's amazing how much exercise and a balanced diet benefits the body. I think, here in our Western society, we tend to expect instant results (and at no sacrafice). So when the exercise and diet aren't working instantly (or WE just aren't working), we give up. Kapow!!! Just like that. And it's easily justified.

But I have HAD to stick with this thing because I made a commitment to it. I've commited to being more disciplined. And even though right now that has not manifested into marathon training, 20 hours a week at the gym, or only eating raw vegetables, I am making great progress. Days are up and down - they will always be. But it seems easier to push through them now that I've got a momentum going. It seems easier to choose to eat healthier, without being too stubborn about it (or legalistic). It seems easier to wake up at 5am to go for a long hard walk or an easy jog (because that's where I'm at right now; again, not a marathon runner). It even seems easier to make sure I don't go a whole day without spending some time in the Word.

On top of this, I feel so much better! When I'm tired, I know it's because I'm actually tired...and not because I'm lazy or lathargic. I have more energy during the day, my mood is way better, my body feels more refreshed and lighter, and I even feel a lot more beautiful. It's only been, what? Three weeks? And I'm seeing the fruit of even just the physical aspect of it.

So now it leads me to step two: setting new goals. The first goal was just to begin creating discipline as a habit. Now that that has begun to happen, I need a challange. A really good, but obtainable challange. Folks, tell me: What are your suggestions?

Joy, Joy...Down In My Heart

I should be thankful...

...that whenever I say Jesus, my heart spasms with joy. When I think about prayer, my heart spasms with joy. When I remember even a pinch of what God has done in my life, my heart spasms with joy. Even knowing that there is so much I have to trust God with TODAY, my heart spasms with joy.

Do we really understand how fantastic, how incredible, how AMAZING it is that we are Christians? I have been reminded of this as of late. I mean - do you REALIZE how PRIVELIDGED you are that GOD CHOSE YOU TO ENTER INTO HIS GRACE AND MERCY SO THAT YOU MAY PARTAKE IN ENTERNAL LIFE?!?!?! I mean - that is...beyond words! That is...so undeserved. You did not deserve it. I did not deserve it.

Why...HOW...do we just take that for granted?! But we do. I do. All the time.

Brothers and sisters...are you experiencing joy? Because if you aren't, please - please pray that you do. Honestly, joy is amazing and it can be experienced whatever your circumstances. If you disagree with me, stop pitying yourself. God transcends all of our hardships. His love, his mercy, his kindness, his JOY...transcends any emotion, any frustration, any difficult...ANYTHING! And I am speaking out of PLENTY experience; trust me, I am. I know what it means to need healing; to be absolutely desperate; even to be poor. Granted, I have never been starving, and I have never been beaten within inches of my life. But I have been walked on, I have been taken advantage of on many horrible levels, I have been rejected countless times, and I have had so little that I can only live by the grace of God. I have been depressed, I have been in bondage, I have been harmed beyond my control. But God transcends everything.

But joy requires focusing our hearts on God - and removing the focus from ourselves.

That is all I have to say today - more for myself than anyone else, which is why I will not post this in a facebook message. So if you are meant to read it, you will find your way to it somehow.

May God bless you and fill you with everlasting joy through his Holy Spirit. And may you know the kindness and discipline of his unconditional love. Amen.